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Showing posts from May, 2023

What the hell is that uterus for?

Photo by RDNE Stock project When I got sick with Brucellosis et al , I did a bunch of tests to show that it was indeed bacterial infections screwing me over. Doctors needed all the proofsss. And even then, some of them- (assholes!)- shrugged at the fact that my spleen was enlarged, and I did have some kidney damage. Those things mean nothing; obviously. The tests also showed that I had a fibroid in my uterus.  Good to know, but that wasn't the current issue I was trying to deal with. Or was it? I go on and on with feeling ok and then then terrible- almost up and then way back down again; with no real follow up care because I don't have like a primary care doctor or a cohesive team of specialists looking out for my health and well-being. I'm just fucking winging it- during a pandemic- as you do in third world settings.  So I had to be the one to get blood work on my own and figure out for myself that I'm anemic. Often.  And then I start feeling this pressure and pain in ...

Numb with endless disappointment

Thoughts about my birthday have barely come to mind this year. I used to be such a Taurus desiring to celebrate the whole month of May. Celebrate all the lovely Taureans; celebrate May Day; celebrate Beltane; celebrate Star Wars Day; celebrate moms; celebrate Lemuralia, birds, turtles, goths, geeks, composting, limericks, irises, archery, decency, paper airplanes, road trips, paperclips, freedom of the press, coal miners- all the workers, laughing and smiling, tuna, technology, biological diversity... But now? The dark is winning.  Thanks everyone.