TMi

Some very well cared for human beings flew around the moon this month. I was right there with live-stream of the astronauts as much as I could be enjoying the glitchy feeds, relating hard with the cramped living quarters and... waste management issues. When people go camping they don’t think much about where to put all the shit. It’s natural. It can go in the Nature. Or in the vacuum of space. But what do you do when you have limited resources and are camping out in an urban environment that is all pavement, security cameras, limited privacy, and limited toilet usage? And what ever nature that is available is precious and will be protected from being used as a toilet– I should add. This was one of my logistics nightmares when I was one of the unhoused, living in a van in Williamsburg, Brooklyn back in the Hipster days. Solid waste was by far easier to deal with. One can evacuate into a bag and drop that off in a trash can as one does with dog waste. Liquid waste was more interesting to...

It's the time of year to do it, but looking back is so, so difficult for me.  I don't want to reread my blog entries or my e-journal. It hurts me to see how my life has gone. My life is just going away from me...  Along with my e-journaling, I keep a physical day planner. An object in the real world I use to prove to / remind myself that I do things during the course of a day and that I am not just this lump that is taking up space- except I am this lump that is taking up space- So anyway, I have this day planner i can flip through; if I can endure it: very early in the year I was already wondering why I bothered keeping an account when every day is so much the same small potatoes as every day my eyes skitter over the dubious penmanship that improves or degrades depending on how I am doing physically and emotionally FML repeats on many pages I recorded numerous nights when I did not sleep well enough to function I listed the many days when I took antibiotics I ...

The results of wearing the most un comfortable bra I own. July!  The month were the house starts to kill me in the manner of a slow cook oven. My space is constantly stuffy. Even with the windows open and the fans going. Heat rashes adorn my hand and feet like awful henna designs. It's been hard to sleep.  It's been hard to not get depressed. It's been hard to concentrate.  Fortunately, I won't be stuck in here for the whole  summer! At the end of this month there is a trip to Mexico City lined up. It's part work related, part mental health booster. Because I am losing my mind, thanks for asking.  I am happy to get out.  I would be thrilled to get out except there is as yet a pandemic drifting through the air.  Still drifting through the air.  Mutating as it goes. Sure, sure I got my vaccine, but there is a little fact that keeps slipping people's minds: VACCINES ARE NOT A CURE ALL. I can still get sick even if I have been vaccinated. My CHANC...

Wednesday I went to Tijuana and then across into San Diego. I didn't exactly know it at the time, but it turns out that was the last time I'll be making the crossing for at least a month. The border will be closed to 'non-essential' travel by midnight Friday- today. It seemed like there were too many people outside even though it was pishing doon off and on all day. And, oh, there is supposed to be this highly contagious, potentially deadly virus going around. It was like folks were furiously trying to pretend nothing different is happening in their little end of the world. The rain has been abundant recently, so at one point the car had to turn around and get on the toll road because of flooding. The border crossing took about 40 minutes. Not a long time, but not that quick either. The wet US roadways buzzed and hissed with drivers also desperately pretending nothing is changed; the pretending was so hardcore that there was a two car smash up on the fre...

Photograph: Shawn Punch . Hair and makeup: Madge Earle .

While at an Office Depot this drippy morning picking up supplies with gallery owner Luis De Jesus, Hugo and I daydreamed the future of painting without paint: The idea was that there would be a "smart" primer gesso substance which could be applied to any surface. It would be inert (no currents running through it) until it's programmer/painter touched the surface with finger/hand/body part. Only then would the surface activate- change of color would appear. The programmer would have their own unique palette of colors and would be the only one able to make any mark on the "smart" primer. The person would be the source of energy and would provide the other half of a code string (or something like this) which would activate the desired colors. How would the colors be differentiated? Pressure and heat senses are the obvious ones, but what if the paint was smart enough to recognize the  hormonal difference between the the artist on a good day versus a bad day or ...