TMi

Some very well cared for human beings flew around the moon this month. I was right there with live-stream of the astronauts as much as I could be enjoying the glitchy feeds, relating hard with the cramped living quarters and... waste management issues. When people go camping they don’t think much about where to put all the shit. It’s natural. It can go in the Nature. Or in the vacuum of space. But what do you do when you have limited resources and are camping out in an urban environment that is all pavement, security cameras, limited privacy, and limited toilet usage? And what ever nature that is available is precious and will be protected from being used as a toilet– I should add. This was one of my logistics nightmares when I was one of the unhoused, living in a van in Williamsburg, Brooklyn back in the Hipster days. Solid waste was by far easier to deal with. One can evacuate into a bag and drop that off in a trash can as one does with dog waste. Liquid waste was more interesting to...

blurred image of author signing books. original photo by: Cat I met a famous writer once in New York. It was at a book reading. When the event was coming to a close, I was cajoled into the 'meet and greet' line. I didn't want to queue up. That wasn't how I wanted to meet this writer. Standing in line, I was not a person. In that position I was a fanatic ; with a slight pejorative feeling to the word. It's an itchy label to wear sometimes.  One more person to make the line longer, I was part of the fan gauntlet. This is not a fair kind of meeting. For either party. At the time he had a finger injury; a break, I believe. I do clearly recall that he made a point to tell everyone not to shake his hand. For the obvious splinted reason. Feeling like a complete fool jacked up on the usual influences: caffeine, cortisol mostly; I waited for my turn to meet this renowned individual. Ugh. Be still my conflicted thoughts and feelings. When my time came to stand before the man ...

flea bites and rash all over the torso The saga of tm's questionable health continues. Tests came back positive for Bartonella. Due to my wonderful  third world living circumstances, I contracted a new bacterial infection from fleas brought into the house by a kitten. The kitten was brought into the house by a certain SOME ONE. No one else has been effected by the bacteria. Just me. Just me because I was the one trying to build myself up after a year dealing with Brucella only to then be given the gift of COVID (thanks to SOME ONE) and while trying to recover from that, Bartonella took the opportunity to walk right on into my system. I fought it valiantly for two months. By April, I felt almost the way I did when I had Brucellosis. I saw a doctor. I traveled to New Jersey/NYC keeping myself going with herbs. And then the fun really began! As soon as I started taking antibiotics, the ever delightful Jarisch-Herxheimer Reaction took center stage. But no one warned me about it so I ...

Today is my 40th birthday.  I am not a very happy person.  I woke up in a modern (crap) hotel room in New Jersey instead of some ancient palazzo in Venice Italy. I was supposed to be in Venice. Venice was promised to me twice now and each time it's magically removed from the equation. This last time Hugo suddenly got a show at Mana Contemporary so all the plans changed. Once again. And there was nothing I could do about any of it. I've been away from Mexico for over a week now, but I am still in a kind of cocoon. I haven't reached out to anyone or made any big plans. Being sick strips you of your ability to make plans. The biggest thing I did was buy tickets to see a Lingua Ignota concert in Manhattan on May 8th; a birthday present- to myself. It was a risk, but it was one I was willing to make. To see the best thing that has ever come out of Del f*ing Mar perform live has been the brightest part of my trip so far.  While Hugo paints walls and advances his career,...

Battery Park I walked around Manhattan during September. It's true. It happened. I was there. Never made above midtown. I did go the the Hudson Yards a lot though.  Because the Armory Show was being held there.  Armory Show booth installation That's an immigrant coal miner's name on the wall It also happened to be NY Fashion Week. That meant I all at once found myself as close as 50 feet away from Very Famous People (trade mark) I chuckled at the palpable glow of their fame and wealth. I barked a laugh as I could actually recognize one of them glittering blondely in the light rain. The distance between me there unkempt and outfitted in clothing bought at the US | Mexico border and these million dollar Very Famous People (trade mark) was purely comical. What else could I do but laugh? I am a witness to ridiculous times.  Proenza Schouler fashion show rehearsal on Little Island No context shot from Proenza Schouler fashion show rehearsal on Little Island Walking the st...

I went off to and came back from Mexico City without much of any fanfare.  You didn't notice, did you? I thought I could just tag along on for a music event . Just slip away for a bit. Because what urgent things rest on my aching neck? More than I thought...  It was supposed to be a little vacation for me; a little time away. But when I came back from wandering through the green and previously earthquake shaken streets of Mexico City, I was hit with a suddenly urgent to-do list. After a month of suspended animation I was called into all this action. So the supposed rest and relaxation I accrued went straight out the window.  Between the things I am trying to do for myself, preparation for a big show coming up, and actual paying work- oh and my health issues, I am no blissful, carefree specimen over here. Yeah so, my health remains questionable. I after all I have been through, I developed a 'silent' tooth infection. There was no pain because I had had...

    June 14th would have been Ko Murobushi 's birthday. June 18th will be the 5th anniversary of his death.  He was one of my butoh teachers. Last year I wrote some words for his birthday, but did not publish them at that time. I reworked them now into something better than before; maybe. The words are not adequate, but there they are. Going through my old papers, I found a loose sheet in a notebook with a poem composed by Ko-san.  It was typed in imperfect English so I gave the text some light editing in a way that made sense to me.  Does the dead mind such things?  Does the living?  I can't tell any more.  If you are wondering, the poems do not go together. They are not in dialogue with one another. They just exist in proximity to one another on this page. Like I existed in proximity to Ko-san in New York.  redrum self portrait 2020 original photo: Miro Ito s hared kyphosis i think of you from just two letters k o  smal...

  Who got theyself out to Nuebo Yorq last month? Was it meee?! It was unusually rough in the time leading up to this trip to New York though. There was certainly some energy against us at the beginning. I felt absolutely miserable about going. For no identifiable reason. Hugo was overly anxious about his show, and just before our departure, sure enough, our bad feelings about everything manifested. But once we were on the ground and jumping into the work that thing- that force wanned into the background, it's teeth blunted. Hopefully, it got what it all that it wanted... A small sacrifice to the What-Evers for something much better? There are already signs of better things to come. Hugo was offered another shot at showing in Miami. That means in a few short weeks we will be back on the east coast looking out indifferently at more palm trees. Oh, and installing a mural framed video projection. There might also be some, you know, huge art fairs happening too. Staying ...

I know I missed the big up-trending a few years ago when Ayn Rand came back into blog / article circulation. I believe the popularity surge was thanks, in no small part, to the stupid activities of certain members of this entity out there in the United States called the Grand Old Party- which is full of good ol' boys - which should be disbanded for being such a useless, self-serving, penile-centric club- who like to think Ayn Rand wrote another chapter to the their Holy Book- or something.  So why am I dedicating a blog post to this authoress, this would be screenwriter, this denouncer of It's A Wonderful Life ?    Because here is where my little world tangles with this branch of popular culture: I have one Ayn Rand book-  Anthem . It was given to me when I was working in Queens, NY. I keep it because it was a gift and the object itself has some historic value and significance. An unnerving significance, in that it is officially property of the US. Army. It mu...

τὸν τεθνηκóτα μὴ κακολογεῖν What? It's a new year? Twice over now? No. You can't fool me with that talk. There's nothing new about this year. It is decidedly a continuation of the last one- which was, in fact, a new year; though I won't trouble you with an explanation of how time does not move the way you think it does. And this post here, well, I guess it should finally go out. Ready or not. It's been sitting in edit mode, being edited sporadically for many, many months.  Last summer it was strange to be a tourist in Boston as I had never been in my younger days; when I lived closer to the city and it would have made more sense. I learned about the Bunker Hill misnomer mixup (go look it up) and walked the Freedom Trail. I felt the contentment of the dead in the much visited cemeteries. I saw at least two anorexic women in a posh neighborhood. But hey- why begin an actual written post after all these months of silence by jumping into random commen...

I am so very fortunate to have been able to travel to NYC twice in one summer! This is madhattery with the income I have. But that is the way I have been doing everything since stumbling out into this modern world. Scared senseless about all the tiny details and blundering onward. More travel was intended this year but nothing more is on the horizon now. The slate wiped clean again. I am back in Baja regrouping, getting over a cold (thanks Dan ), buried in virtual piles office work, and trying to find new daydreams to follow through with. Move or Die echos in my under-hearing. And oh yes, you should have seen me go from zero (chills, body aches, feverish mental state) to frelling pissed off like a rutting stag at an all male review ready to gore anything that moves funny. I probably just generated a cancer in the process... but there it went.. this rage.. ripping me right out of the duuuh. And why? Well I don't know why it was so intense but I was supposed to be convalescing...

Back from NYC and things are EXCITING in Mexico. So exciting, in fact, that I haven't been able to recount my trip! I was able to get over my jetlag easily. I learned from a fellow traveller that you do recover faster when traveling into the future. Go figure!  Along with dodging bullets, I have been celebrating my Human's birthday all weekend (Superman movie anyone?) and generally feeling a holiday vibe around the joint because Hugo's brother is visiting from Rome and wants to do vacationy things. We are planning an excursion to Valle De Guadalupe on Thursday so he won't torture us more with the exemplary entertainment the YouTube has to offer. Life isn't truly ridiculous until a priest insists on showing variations on the Psy / Gangnam Style theme. As for my NYC trip: on the whole, I was satisfied with it. I did the things that I wanted- also needed to do. And a collaboration project that I hadn't been counting on came through. I did some green ...